Oh my sweet friend, you are a special one, you know that?

I am so sorry you had to have that conversation with your daughter. It must have been heartwrenching to hear your little girl in such pain.

I wrote this to a friend of mine and I wanted to share it with you.

When I was little, in my crazy, dysfunctional, f'd up family, my father would set aside 30 minutes a week for just the two of us. We would do whatever I wanted - a board game, a walk, watch the Yanks, whatever.

And even though he was a great dad - came to school events, sporting events, talked to me about stuff - it is those 30 minutes that I remember so vividly. Those 30 minutes that matter so much, even now.

So, dont measure your time with your children in hours or days. Measure it in moments - an arm around a shoulder, throwing a ball, swimming in a hotel pool, going camping. Those are the memories they will carry the rest of their lives.

And they will remember that during a very difficult part of their childhood, their daddy acted with honor. Their daddy was the stable, loving parent. They will. I promise you that.

The financial stuff, well, that just sucks. I know from where you speak - I am probably never going to recover from it.

I will be living in a tent somewhere - lol! But, I will know that I have nothing to be ashamed of. I acted in the best way I knew how. And I protected my son as best I could.

They will be ok, Eric, as long as you are ok.

And you are right, we should own the stuff we brought to the marriage and change the things that need changing. But I have to believe that I did the best I could with the tools I had at the time. Had I known better, I would have done better.

I am so glad your brother reached out to you. God does hear us. And the ultimate example of letting go is trusting that He will be there with a gentle, outreached hand to pick us up.

Sweetie, I hope that you find peace. I hope that you realize what a gift you are to so many. I hope you know that we are better for knowing you.

So, try real hard to be kind to yourself and take care of yourself. It's ok to think about Eric a little. Trust that what is supposed to happen will. Remember to grow and learn.
Cherish those children. Be still and listen. And when you can, kiss some ass.

You'll be ok. You will. Know how I know? New York, baby, New York.