WAW says she wants to come back

[Grocerykartman]

The problem is, it's kind of like the saying "if you have to ask, it loses all meaning." Over the course of 1.5 years, I have done everything I could think of. She actually first asked about 1.5 years ago permission to go to the movies with the guy "as friends", to which I of course told her would not be ok. Since then she hasn't listened to a thing I said...for a long time I did all the wrong things, until I discovered sites like this and quit chasing her. Got a life to the best of my abilities and have made quite a few good male friends to fill the void. I know I will be ok if this doesn't work out, but that's always easy to say now.

But as far as her giving up OM goes, I tried everything....I told her no, I affirmatively told her no, I gave her ultimatums as long ago as new years day to quit this, in my most embarassing times I begged and pleaded, I acted indifferent, I suggested we spend more time together, I suggested we spend less time together, I suggested we spend no time together, I told her repeatedly you have to give him up before I can have any heart for working on this, I told her as I've posted here before, I can't see talking about the two of us when there are three of us, I talked to her about it as I spied, I quit spying and talked to her with more innocence, you name it, I've done it. The only thing I haven't done is actually tell her what she says she wants in that letter, and that is to try and take a leap of faith that she will give him up.

And I still say NO DICE to that. But it's hard. I second guess myself particualrly where my daughter is concerned. But that tells me something to, it's not my wife that is my first worry, it is my daughter. Not saying that's misprioritized, but the gap in my worry is significant. It doesn't help that all the while I feel like I am just trying to push her and coerce her into giving up OM. It needs to be from her heart, not from my wishes.

It is good to see that I'm not the only one who thinks she has it backwards. I take no joy in that though, it just confirms how bad the situation still is.