I heard a saying that I've been using myself, "Happiness is a DIY job", it was her job (and still is) to make herself happy, just like it's your job to make YOU happy.
You can each add to each other's happiness and assist in making you lives and existence more enjoyable but your own happiness is your own responsibility.
Unfortunately people fall into the trap of high expectations and placing a lot of pressure on others to make them happy and that never works because you keep wanting more and more and more and you become a bottomless pit, someone else can't fill up that emptiness if you're not able to do it yourself.
No more relationship talks with the wife DSH, just tell her that she filed for divorce, you are moving on with your life, she needs to do the same and your priority right now is finalizing the details of your new living arrangements for you and your kids - what she does or has to do now is of no consequence to you.
When you finally let go and I mean really let go of her and she feels it (because just saying words and performing real actions are two different things), that's when she will have her awakening.
You won't be there to make her "unhappy" anymore and she'll still be unhappy, you won't be the reason for her unhappiness but she'll still feel it and that's when she will realize that she was part of the problem.
Right now she's just flapping her gums, in part to try and make you feel better about what she's doing, it's also possible because she feels guilty for her part in all of this, it's hard to say, you can't read her mind (I know I can't).
Just let her be, you take care of you and your kids, that's all you need to do right now.
