John, she's not working on the marriage. Staying in the house isn't working on the marriage, it's not trying. It's cohabitating.
Put a boundary down. If you feel that your issues can only be addressed in MC, then say that. If you think the two of you can resolve your issues without counseling, keep doing what's going on. If you think that she just needs time before going to counseling, be patient. Lead.
