Just a journal of a couple things. Starting weight training (again) tomorrow morning. Reading Learned Optimism was eerie. My score was dismal on all fronts. Don't quite know what to think about that. Feel kind of foolish - like I missed the boat on that somewhere but I don't know where and when. I feel kind of left behind in an odd way. Like I'm missing out - and have missed out - on a lot of wonderful things. And even worse, for some god-unknown reason it made me think about the neglect I went through as a kid and ended up crying and angry. I'm so darned mad I turned out like this; I'm so darned mad I caused the problems I have in my M because of the way I am.

Anyways; that's the icky part. The good part is that I figured out that silence is a much better defense, than constant explaining and justifying is when H's questioning my feelings and beliefs. If I say nothing, he has nothing to argue with. Hah. Can I still 'find my voice' if I'm silent?

I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.