Sex and money is managed as a couple in a good marriage. Choices are made in that area as a couple, not independently.
Your husband's issue isn't financial independence as much as familial independence... He isn't supposed to be independent financiall.. he should be working with you as a couple financially.. Telling him to be financially independent is akin to telling him he should be sexually independent.
He has'tn broken free of his parents' grasp... They coddle him and he allows it...
YOur H has issues and his parents are terrible enablers.. its a huge battle to have to fight there...
WHen you marry you shift your attachments from your parent to your spouse while maintaining respect for both... financial and sexual attachments should shift in a healthy marriage
Your H hasn't accepted this shift... It is betrayal, I wouldn't second guess that at all
Just knowing what he's doing doens't make it any less invasive... There are a lot of spouses on here who know their WS is cheating on them, but they still feel incredibly violated...
If your husband isn't working with you as aa couple then he's cheating... sexually or financially it makes little difference
