Back in Feb/March of this year, I heard her say the words, "This is the best our M has ever been!" We were the strongest we'd been in years.
As far as you know, the current EA started about a month later, right around your April blowup. What changed in your M between March and April for your W to open up to someone else, or did the EA start before this, and your W said this to try to convince herself? She did start taking classes with OM in January...
Most LBS's, including myself, thought things were pretty good pre-bomb. I see how you look at your W; how does she look at you?