OK so we can hold of on SENDING the letter, but WORK on it until it is what I need it to be.
Meanwhile, she got all her packing done so she won't be back into the house until moving day on Sunday. And I sure as Hell WONT be here for that.
She MAY be softening, but it PROBABLY is SWEET TALKING and CAJOLING me into consenting to selling the house.
She probably is trying to play to my soft side and use my feelings for her as a weapon against me.
She's a sneaky little one and I think she still has a few tricks up her sleeve yet. But maybe she HAS seen that I have and am growing, and that her and her mom can't send me over the edge ANYMORE.
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Your wife turned this into a battle of wills not you.
The funny thing is that she KEPT SAYING:
"I will work with you in whatever way possible to make this smooth and get it OVER. I will work with you and we can work TOGETHER to get our lives separate".
She must have said "work with you" about ten times. All in reference to speeding the divorce and selling of the house along.
OH, and she also kept saying this:
"I gave you CHOICES ALL ALONG THE WAY. I ALWAYS let you know AHEAD of time what I would be doing. I gave you CHOICES to make with the house, with living together, and with the finaces. Filing for divorce, moving out, canceling the utilities, and packing. I ALWAYS gave you a CHOICE, and your actions in choosing speak very loudly".
All of that above is just for show dude, you know that.
Your wife is a talented politician.
By that I mean she's very good at doing what she WANTS covertly while putting on a great show verbally in open public... She's perfectly content to contradict herself and carry on her day... In short, she's a shameless liar.
She knows she's not working with you... But when she SAYS that people think "oh, she's owrking with him"... MANY ignorant people will hear what she says and accept the face value of it and not actually look at what she's doing.
Your wife has been on the attack for months. Your wife has run roughshod over your efforts to cooperate Your wife she springs her choices on you with the least amount of notice possible for full effect
She's not working with you, but for the casual listener, they will hear that and think this is indeed the case.
An intelligent person can filter out the crap and see through it, but your wife is a talented politician... She knows how to talk and win people over... even if no one other than her bulldog of a mother is listening.
If you want to try her trick go ahead :
Just say one thing and do the opposite :
"You are welcome in my home any time you like...", put a chain on the door "I am working with you completely here...", throw a party in the home while she's away "I want to help in any way I can", On moving day just sit back and watch her carry out heavy boxes and don't lift a finger but keep saying "did you need any help?"
Its classic passive aggression... She wants to LOOK cooperative while being counterproductive as much as possible
You can try the same game if you want, but I don't reccomend it.
This is her game, she talks loudly to present a public image, but behind the scenes and in teh details you can see how counterproductiev her efforts are
Most casual observers wont' see it.. But a courtroom will
A judge will just tell her to shut up and show him the facts. She won't have any to back up her blustering and you will have tons to show otherwise.
Her performance is for her friends and her mother because those people won't look beyond the surface...
