Sounds like your WAW is miserable and is playing the victim. Maybe she will finally realize that leaving the M doesn't stop the hurt/anger/fear, etc. Her anger will stay with her until she deals with it. Anger= hurt and pain over a real or perceived loss.
My anger is what drove my H away. Your WAW sounds alot like me. BUT there are differences, Pinhead.I don't want to be considered like your wife, no offense meant!!!
My H is a tough man, very closed. I know H's reaction to my pain made my anger much worse than it should have been. But I own my anger.I should have controlled my emotions better.
Your WAW must have had some great qualities or you would not have been attracted to her in the first place. The good stuff gets buried under all the s--t. Sounds like your WAW is hurting ( I am not taking her "side" here), and never has known how to go about expressing hurt or going about getting from you, what she wants/needs.THAT has been MY problem in the second M and actually, the first as well. But I was only 18 and "blame" failure of M on being young and stupid. Am I old and stupid this time? lol
Anyway, it is up to each of us to ask for what we want, calmly and in a tone that is not accusatory. I would bet your wife has abandonment issues. I know I do. Again, I own them.
If my WAH had only said, "honey, I know you are are angry, scared, afraid, but we will work through this together", I may have been able to stop being hurt/angry early on in M. But he always told me "you're a crazy, out of control b---h, etc. It only added fuel to the fire within.
