I guess what it boils down to is that I want my marriage back, but feel that somehow I shouldn't. I guess it's the old doormat thing.
I have no excuses left for my H. He is an functional alcoholic with PTSD and MLC to boot. A Psychologist wet dream. I'm just tired of the reality I'm living in at the moment. Wish I could fast forward a couple of years, be somewhere else in my life.
I've been divorced before. I know what that is like. I was raising 4 kids by myself when I met my H. He adopted the two youngest. Is my ex's life a pretty picture? No, but he constantly says he doesn't know why we ever got married in the first place, we were so different, so apparently he doesn't feel the divorce was the wrong thing. We are still on friendly terms. He'll help me out in a heartbeat.
Just a very self-questioning few days I've been having.
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
