CNS, It is late so I am only going to focus on one thing that you mentioned and what it is I learned about it in a book I recently read. It is be more EMOTIONAL. The book is "How to Improve Your Marriage without Talking About IT" (HTIYMWTAI), and PEI recomended to me. (nickel PEI).
Women "need" that EMOTIONAL connection, in order to give the physical connection.
Men "need" that PHYSICAL connection, in order to give the EMOTIONAL connection.
She has fears and anxieties and when you emotionally connect with her you alleviate those fear and anxieties.
You have insecurities and or shame about being able to satisfy her or "fend off potential suitors" and when she physically connects with you she alleviates those insecurities and shame you have.
Do you see the vicious cycle here???
Sooooo one of you has to do the opposite of what you feel like doing.
Guess who that is going to be?????
That's right......You.
Originally Posted By: crushednstuck
What does more emotional mean?
When she asks you how your day was at work, don't just tell her it was fine. Tell her some details.
"Well today Joe Job came in my office and thanked me for the work I did on XYZ project"
Don't stop there, you could go on and tell her how that made you FEEL and why it made you FEEL that way.
"I had worked for weeks on the XYZ project and put in a lot of hours and it made me feel good to have my efforts recognized"
and you could go on to say....
"You know W, this is not the exact job I want and well you know how I wish I made more money, it helps me to deal with those things when I feel good about the work I do."
Oh and BTW you need to be looking at her in her eyes when you tell her this. This is the EMOTIONAL connection she is craving.
If you guys are having dinners together and doing other things I think it would be appropriate to open up to her a little about something mundane like that. Experiment and see what happens.
This is not to replace the hard work you are to be doing on yourself, but as you stated you guys are at least interacting, might as well make it good interactions.
Cheers
BINGO!
Well said missher! Man, am I glad I recommended that book to ya PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
