She's in MLC, but I was weak. Now what?

[crushednstuck]

Security. She wants that. She noted she did not feel protected; which I found ironic. At 6'6" and 250lbs I spent a little time bowing up to fend off the would-be suitors. I think when her need to control was overwhelmed by all the simultaneous life events she couldn't control, she was insecure. I wasn't there to step in and recognize her crisis as I was fully engaged in my own stuff.
For me I've dropped some lbs and suffered some injuries that have dented the stand-by fix for success. Getting older sucks. Just when I'm questioning my professional direction and the ego takes a sucker punch by the body's deterioration, W goes for OM. I'm not proud of the fling, but I almost needed the self-esteem boost. Unfortunately, it didn't last as long as the encounter because I know I want my W and family back. She also now doubts all the tours I made without her and my fidelity during them.