Your H is giong to be miserable for the rest of his life until he deals with his issues... They are his and they will travel with him whomever he chooses to live with... He will learn when he is too old and too alone what a mess he's made of his life... And how many warnings he got along the way he chose to ignore...
He can avoid a wasted life like that and enjoy something substantial if he just finds the courage to man-up and own who he is and what he does both good and bad... and negotiate rather than buckle or run...
There IS a middle-ground in life between escape and surrender and that is where happiness truly lives...
