I was reading an article about wive's and families of policemen who have to live this way, but its a bit different.
Those women and their children have to live each day knowing that they may get a phone call at any time informing them their H has been killed in the line of duty, etc. This causes a great deal of anxiety and fear, but in that case its a bit different...
His JOB is what does that to the family not his attitude... And I think Police have to buy a lot of insurance due to the risks they are taking... Which I know is only money but it does set the mind at ease...
Living with the idea that your H and father can and wants to walk out on you every day takes its toll... Feeling miserable isnt' a justification to beat your family to death with it...
I don't want to tell people who feel sad simply to suck it up, but sharing the idea of escape iwth yoru family while IGNORING THIER panic ENTIRELY just seems incredibly destructive and selfish
Yep: you're right. With H, he doesn't even get that he is inducing this panic. Everyone is being strong and resiliant, so he's fine with it. AND...it doesn't help that he feels as long as he is contributing his paycheck that he's "doing his job" and providing security. I don't think he gets that emotional security is just as important, if not more so, that financial security. I've tried telling him but he doesn't see it quite frankly - at least not right now.
