Whenever I spoke about the children or our family and how it tears me up when I think about all they are going to miss out on, or how they will feel shortchanged when one parent can't give each son the attention he demands, she just stared in silent reflection. Never agreeing in any way. The only time she showed emotion was when I thanked her for giving me children and when she talked about herself and how she hasn't found her happiness and is scared about the changes she is creating. I am sitting next to her a changed man, and she is still in the starting blocks waiting for me to leave so she can get to work on herself and go through the self-discovery.
I can still sense anger and frustration. I have seen lots of mood swings, and she also said, after I suggested being the ultimate babysitter so she can get more time to herself, that she feels guilty when away from the kids. Her helper can't play with two boys out in the yard alone (no fences). So she feels compelled to be there as much as possible. I fail to see reality and her master plan meshing very well. Take dad out of the equation and only then will happiness come(?).
