Lots of folks here and otherwise, including all my own kids have been telling me to get down the road, and I have gotten out of the way and let this d happen.
I have always tried to think the best (to a point)of my W and her motives. Today it seems they were made very clear. It was about the $. As the hearing progressed there were things said that did not make me feel warm and fuzzy, as is to be expected. On leaving the hearing I was visibly upset/dissapointed, but said nothing to her. She then calls out to me with a comment-"what? Now you're mad?". Is she really that...out of touch?
As she left the house afterwards, looking into what once were beautiful loving eyes, there is nothing there but emptiness and coldness. What a shame that she has made a choice to be this cold non feeling "poor me" victim, who blames everyone else for her unhappiness. I'm sure on the next go around, the judge will also be colluding with me to sap every bit of hope from her and add to her bitterness.
I feel terribly sad to see what she has become, and terribly sad to see where it has left us, me. I am going to do my best to wade through this abyss, but right now it is bleak, and will be for awhile.
Time will heal all scars if we let it, with God's help we can be whole again. I'm eager to get on that path, but realize there is a certain amount of pain and healing that must happen first.
I know many here feel this same sort of pain that just does not have to happen if different choices were made. Simple choices really to forgive, change ones attitude and concentrate on the positive. Such a waste of a productive life and how it robs others of productivity.
I am normally not so down through this, but today...well it's just got the better of me. Thanks for the shoulders!
