I will paste my posts at the end of this msg. I'm a little embarrassed about how I handled some of the situations, but I was "hurting" and I'm a little on the stubborn side -- you'll see what I mean when you read them. I had two different threads since I left the Newcomers's section. I will admit that I'm still hurting big time. I do have my good days and bad days.
The pluses: I GAL big time, I do things for myself, I’m learning A LOT about myself and relationships, and I try to keep the communication open with my wife. I also don’t bring up the R talk or the OM. If she brings it up, I sometimes comment. Ever since she moved out (7/31/09), I haven’t argued with her. I can also stay very positive by going to my support groups, praying, etc. This helps big time.
The minuses: I haven’t detached from my W (this might be a plus though, depending who you talk to), I have pursued my W by giving her some things (bday present, made a scrapbook when she graduated with her MBA, and gave her some other little things, which for the most part upset her), and I still call her, but this is mostly about my job search… I do share some things happening in my personal life too (can be good or bad, depending on who you talk to).
I will admit that if I was graded on how I D-busted, I would probably fail. I’m pretty sure though that I might’ve been in the same situation today, whether or not I D-busted.
Anyway, I hope you can learn something from my situation (some of the advice I received was very good)!
