I am in the same sitch when it comes to the house. She took over the mortgage years ago. It's all hers now.
I agree that the one who breaks the family should leave, but it does not always work that way.
If I end up moving at least the door will stay open. We have 4 dogs and a cat that I will be visiting. She won't be able to shut me out of her life completely. At least I can maintain contact and see if DB works.
On the other hand if she leaves she would be out of her comfort zone and may turn around sooner. Then again, she may just sever all the ties.
The bottom line is that the detachment has to happen within the same house or not. That's the only way to break the misery.
