In many ways I wish I had thrown in the towel sooner. Not that I am disagreeing with DB principles, but that they were just not going to work in their unvarnished form in my sort of situation. I think, paradoxically, that had I recognized xW for just exactly who she really was and agreed to the divorce sooner then tough love might have shaken her to more rational regard for me and my position. Perhaps. I think resisting her through trying to "save" the M merely gave her something to fight against and a means to demonize me. I do not think it would have changed the final outcome, we likely still would have divorced, but it might have taken the wind out of her sails for her next phase, which was to try to also take my children away.
Think that totally makes sense. Dropping the rope is hard but essential. Hindsight is always 20/20 though.
Originally Posted By: NoCodeBlues
But of course one should not be dwelling too long in the past other than to learn from it. The apostles tell us, "But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." [Phillipians 3:13-14]
We have to keep moving forward, at whatever pace we are able.
