Beyond Depression..but still a losing battle?

[Lucky11too]

I ended up meeting with H today at lunch to sign some paperwork for the new place (the first step is getting the liqour license transferred, so I had to fill out some affadavit as the spouse). I used H's form as my template to fill out and interesting where it asks marital status (single, married, widowed, separated), H checked married. (I was going to check separated, but I didn't want to cause an issue with conflicting forms). He bought me lunch, which is the least he could do, but it was nice. I'm having an internal conflict tho now. As I was leaving, he gave me a hug and said that my back was really tight (which it totally is - it's been giving me a lot of pain recently) and that he would like to give me a backrub Wed or Thurs after he comes to see S. I'm torn b/c I get the benefit of it, so I almost feel silly telling him "no, you can't rub my back and make me feel better), but on the other hand, I don't want to encourage our R, when I believe OW3 is still on the side. I mean, I obviously don't know for sure what the status of the R with OW3 is, but H hasn't said any differently, so I only have to assume that she's still in the picture. I just really feel like I'm not getting thru to him. I end up pretty much having to "ruin" any time together by harping on the OW3 issue. This is a sensitive point for me b/c this is one of the things I did that kind of drove him away in the first place (I did exactly what DB said not to do!). He was hardly home but whenever he was home, I "nagged" that he was never home. It makes it an endless cycle b/c who wants to stay home when all you get is nagging. Kind of the same idea here, but I don't understand why he doesn't understand the issue with OW3 and the pain it causes me! So I don't now, I'm just having trouble figuring out how to handle this. I just know I want to nip this in the butt once and for all!

Last note, H went to the ENT dr today and got approved for the sleep study. He hasn't made the sleep study appt yet but I expect he'll be able to get in within the next week or two. I just really hope some kind of direction comes out of this for him, b/c I'm losing patience!