You're not giving up on your M by moving out. You're letting it go for now, dropping the rope, finding yourself and making you and your DD a priority.
How is everything you say so perfect? Thank you for re-framing this for me. I don't know if I believe it totally but I'll work on it.
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It is hard to know whether you'll be happier in the new setting but the new setting is not a life sentence. You adapt, you change, you change the setting if you want to. You are in control and with your cautious and good decision making personality you'll be just fine.
Well I don't think it's impulsive, you've been thinking about this for a while but it's the taking of your first step in that direction that's making you uneasy which is understandable but I bet you took greater 'risks' in life than finding an apt to move to and you survived- perhaps backpacking in the backcountry or bungee jumping etc?
never done the latter, but yes, backpacking many times, including alone. In fact, I'll be going again soon, need to get away. I see that as fun though, not a risk! The only thing I've been through that compares to the fear I feel now was making the decision to have a child and then living with that fear for 10 months while pregnant. I was very very unsure, and it's turned into the best thing I've ever done.
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I didn't see the: "you're right, we're not meant to be together" that's the beauty of that sentence from Robx/Gucci (i forget) it's open to interpretation but has a powerful message about you not becoming a doormat. But of course you have to see when and if you should use it.
I can understand all your thoughts and emotions about wanting to keep trying or give it one more try and I'll never tell you not to do it because ultimately we all have to live with our decisions. However, look at the history and decide if it'll make a difference and if he's even anyone you want to have for the rest of your life? You're still young! and about the concerns over your future R and marriage etc don't let one person define your whole life. And you know what NB? Who the heck cares if you can't find the right guy anyway? (hypothetical worse case scenario)? you're whole, you're complete, you don't need anyone else to be happy. Find yourself, enjoy yourself and treat yourself well.
Well, I don't want to be alone forever, but I'll deal with that later. You're right, the history is telling. Telling me there's not much chance of change. I almost wish I felt more hope b/c this "starting to accept" thing is really ugly and I'm fighting it. OTOH, I'm exhausted and I haven't even been "working on things" the past few months, just DBing and trying to avoid the baiting and arguing while staying sane. I'm just plain tired.
but I'll work on it.
