Hint: We (women) are manipulaters by nature. We know how to get you do to what we want and think it is what you wanted all the time. USUALLY. As bad as it has been with my H in MLC, a female in MLC is SCARY SH!T.
ff punkin, You are awesome!!! I got a great feeling when I read this. The guys here appreciate your honesty. Add to what you said a woman that flips like a switch overnight and you wake up to the twilight zone every morning with no end in sight. Ever watch Groundhog Day with Bill Murray? It is much like that except the hurt you feel for your kids just kills your heart.
Stilltrying, I feel for you man! Seen and heard much of what you wrote. The paranoia the MLC'r gets is really wacky. Sometimes their vocabulary includes words or phrases you have not heard for years from them. Things that you may have joked together about in the past now becomes part of their current thoughts except it is not funny now to them or yourself. I have even heard words in her vocabulary that I know her brother has said or her "New Friends" have said recently. I hope I am making some sense for you but my W has become a parrot for others and she is an intelligent woman. It is an identity loss. Thinking clearly for herself appears to be impossible for her. The more I keep my mouth shut and just say "That makes sense" or " I can see how you would see it that way" actually keeps her anger from coming out and more strange things come out instead. This takes practice to do but I am betting you will see some of the same as me. Grit is right. This is a long process. I wish I could give you an estimate on how long. Sorry, no cando. That means one thing. YOU have to work on YOU and detach. I hate hearing this too. It will make YOU better. If you were good before you will be awesome when YOU work on YOU. Then you will realize she would be absolutely crazy to leave you. When you start getting comments from people you know that you are different or a good husband something along those lines, then you know you are moving whether your wife notices or not. Mine did notice but she can't face the guilt yet. So I will keep working on me. She will lose if she leaves and that is where you want to be too.
