You're messing it up because you won't take the focus off of your H and put it where it belongs, on you. That is where it has to start. If all you're doing is thinking about your H and what he thinks or how he'll react, then where's the time for you?
This is your choice. You can work on you and possibly have a chance of saving your M or you can continue as you have been and destroy all possibility, because the only thing you're doing is pushing him further away at this point.
Honey, please don't get me wrong. I'm not saying your H's MLC is your fault, it is not, and it's not about you. You didn't break him and you can't fix him. Just let him go and let God watch out for him.
However, you recognize your role in the breakdown of your M. You see the things you must change. Change them for yourself. These changes aren't a trick or ruse to bring your H back, they're for you. Be the change you want to see.
Please realize there is still joy and happiness to be had in your life, with or without your H.
Only way to get to it is through it.
You can do this 2, for yourself, and your precious children.
