For instance, we got to our destination and she spent 10 minutes fretting over all the trash the boys had left in the van. It was comical, it was 100+ degrees outside and she's climbing around the van tidying up. I gave her the keys and turned to go inside. She got pissy about it and I told her: "look, we just drove 3 hours to get here and I don't want to stand in the sun watching you clean the car out. I'll be inside with the kids when your done". She of course felt like I shouldn't just stand around watching and should want to help her. In my mind, they were going to re-trash it on the way home, so the sensible thing was to make them clean it out when we got there. Plus, we had been waiting to get here, why not get to it right away. so I left her to it. She was mad, but got over it. The doormat is gone!
Glad to hear the doormat is gone AG!!! My W is the same way, it has to be done her way and when she wants it to. In my case, I don't even see it most of the time and she doesn't ask for help. She just does it and then complains about it. This is her issue and she wants to lay it on you!
Originally Posted By: A_goodman
She went out both Thursday night (dancing) and Friday night (dinner and a movie W/ best friend). I blew it off both nights without much emotion. Ditto for the pursuer!
I'm with you here too man! She went out on Sat nite until 2 or 3am and I don't have any idea what she did. She doesn't tell me and I don't ask. Go live the life you missed while we were raising kids. I'm sure it will be a good replacement for your family.
Originally Posted By: A_goodman
I realize and accept my culpability. Although her original and onging history revisions and inability to pinpoint concrete needs that are going unmet at MC make it difficult to understand exactly what I'm culpable of. Regardless, I understand that I had a big part to play.
Same here, which makes me believe that we really aren't that culpable and maybe it has more to do with unrealistic expectations and childhood fantasies.
Originally Posted By: A_goodman
But still, it makes me really angry some days that she is so damned selfish that she is risking everything we've worked for, everything we've meant to each other and most importantly the future wellbeing of our boys just for some selfish idea that she'll "finally" be happy. It's BS.
This is starting to make me really angry too. It's a f-ing PIPE DREAM. Once we are gone, they will be happy?? Really....I doubt it. If this D really goes through to the end and our financial situation collapses, I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive her. I'm starting to get there already.
Originally Posted By: A_goodman
The train is warming up and the conductor is starting to glance at his watch.
ALL ABOARD! This train is leaving the station!
Hang tough AG. I appreciate all of your support and hope I can do the same for you.
