I understand about not wanting to live with lies. But that's what addicts do, and your H has a really tough addiction. If you've read the posts here, you know he has such angst/shame over you knowing the truth. Ask your therapist about resources for you. It's great that he is going to SA, but don't they have resources for the spouses/families too? I would also ask if it would be a good idea for you to speak with H's sponsor. It might help him to provide better support if he knew the real truth. SA will also be able to help you with a confrontation strategy on the lying.
