Coping every day

[LRT Land]

Hi S - I have been going down the Divorce Remedy road a few weeks now. I've seen very positive results from my H. If you find my thread, you'll see he actually hired a lawyer and had them send me a little (with no warning) that he wanted to end the M. At first I argued, cried, reasoned and none of it helped. My H is an engineer too (liked the posts from the guys btw). THen I found DR and this wonderful site. REad the quotes threads - they helped me tremendously. Within 10 days of doing 180s, detaching respectfully, agreeing, validating, apologizing (even though obviously it takes two to mess up a M) I saw some positive signs. Not out of the woods as the lawyer is still lurking and I have had a couple days where I've had to dig deep and decide if this is in fact what I want after years of rockiness, detachment, etc.

THe best thing about DR is you will start feeling better about YOU. You will find YOU again and not the angry, annoyed person your M created.

I told my H and I meant it that I didn't want to go back to the way things were either, so either we work hard to make it better or we end it. BUt at least at the end of the road I will know I did everything I could and was the best I could be.