Hey Piano, i got emotional reading what you want to say to your H. In my opinion, keep it as what your feelings are, as you have done, but dont mention how you deserve better, he knows that, or how he states he is in love w./ someone else, etc. just keep it as you telling him what you feel, how you accept that your M wasnt 100% perfect and that you would make changes, etc.
If you start mentioning that you deserve better or that he left, he will withdraw and pull back and become defensive. Leave him with the memory of you expressing HOW YOU FEEL and let him decipher the rest! he knows you deserve more... regardless of all of the rotten things he has said to you recently, he does know how this affected you. i believe all of our WAS do. They just do not admit it... if they do, they fear that we will take it as a sign of R and this scares them!
At this point, what do you have to lose... he leaves in what 19 days? and what is wrong with expressing your feelings... maybe he needs to hear this...
Someone recently told me... ask for help... let him know you need him... i tend to come off a bit independent and act as if, i cant do it all on my own... its very wrong... do you find that you do the same? Have you told your H that you would like him to help you in raising your bub? or that you need his help? ( i dont mean that you need him to survive) or that you would like him to be a part of your lives?
Have you thought about taking baby steps and for right now just gaining his trust and friendship? rather than just for marriage.. he needs to feel safe and comfortable enough around you without being attacked with R talk and ILY etc. Maybe you should try the lets try to be amicable for the bub's sake... show him you have a heart and how kind you are! be the woman he fell in love with...
