When you are perfectly happy doing whatever it is that you do on a Friday or Saturday night without feeling like you need to be out on a date.
Seriously, when you stop "needing" male company. When you are perfectly happy alone with your child. Then, when you do date, you can be more objectively selective.
We're back to how GAL was really for you, and why you needed to do it whether or not you saved your M.
I do not have any issues being home alone on a Fri or Sat night! That IS NOT why I am dating! I am dating for male companionship and for some validation. So what? Dating does not have to mean looking for my next husband, sheesh! 75% time that I was going out this summer was with my friends, not these 3 men I went out with!
When I want to find my next serious relationship, I will approach this pretty damn differently. But I guess I don't have to defend myself...just am procrastinating before starting chores. SO I will respond a little more.
I think I know myself (weaknesses and strengths) and know what I am doing.
Ideally, I could have learned about GAL years ago before I got married but I didn't OK? I learned about GAL from this terrific woman, MWD, because I was facing divorce. So I GALed in order to rebuild my self esteem and to hopefully capture interest of my stbxh. Well obviously we can't make someone else love us. So I still GALed, nonetheless, and it helped me to feel better about myself, meet different people, enjoy my life a little more, etc.
And when I kind of fell into dating, I realized GAL helped to prepare me to date. DATE. NOT BECOME SERIOUS.
So thanks for helping me to find a way to explain myself I guess ?!?
Last edited by newmama; 07/31/1007:53 PM.
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004