She's perfected manipulating you. She knows your limits, and your fears, and is using them to control you.
You don't sound like you're convinced of your boundaries, of your needs and desires.
I would spend some time alone while thinking them through before talking to her about them.
You deserve to have a happy, healthy relationship. And trust me, coming from my screwed up life, this isn't one. Trust in your heart, not in what this abusive woman has been feeding you.
