I know that my wife feels like the bad guy. She hates when I use the phrase "you're leaving..." So I think you're right about her footdragging being part of avoiding blame/guilt.
In fact, that makes me want to do a 180; I'm usually very impulsive, and moving the process along might be the wrong thing. I should make her find a mediator, make her come up with a division of assets, etc. etc.
Someone once said "don't resist, but don't assist either."
Maybe that's wrong, and I should stick to my original plan of telling her to get out ASAP. I could combine the two; tell her to get out, and make her do the work.
