Had therapy after work, talked about DS for half of it and H for the other half, told her about my concerns with letting go and moving on (more on those in next post). Told her about my conversation with DS where he sounded so callous, it was like H was sitting there talking to me. Told her about H's e-mail he sent me a couple weeks back, she said she had some not so nice words in mind and said that his letter was all about him and what he expected me to give him and that he wants friendship so he doesn't have to feel guilty for what he's done. I was already thinking that he was feeling guilty and that was why he wanted to be friends. I told her how I don't plan to ever date or get involved with someone again, she said that was silly to feel that way, that I can't predict the future. Fine then, right now at this point in time, I do not ever plan on dating or being with anyone other than my H. Overall though I don't feel much got accomplished that session other than her insisting that H is not going to come back to me. Way to be positive, Doc.
Same with my wife. If I don't act all friendly and chatty Cathy, she starts to get really worried. It's all about controlling us, whether consciously or unconsciously. If we can be friends with them, it means they haven't hurt us that badly. And if we're friends, we'll be there for them when they want or need us.
