OK Dan. I have to plead stupidity here. I came back to where we were last night and failed to notice that there was an additional page. My last post seems strangely out of context.
Dude, you do sound really down right now. But even so, look how strong you are. Even bummed, you are still helping Jstar and others feel good about themselves. I remember reabing your string when I first found this. I was blubbering like a little girl - for both of us. You were in agony and I was right there with you. I'd like to say something encouraging like: "It will all be over soon and you'll be really happy." but hell, I don't know that. I lag you a little in this. However that we will be happy again is what the pros are telling us. so far they haven't steered either of us wrong yet, so there's the encouragement.
Steve made a good point, but you know, there's going to be lots of opportunities to get that right. Your D will grow up and will have a ton of great influence from you about what happened and that you BOTH love her. Don't beat yourself up about that. And if you want to go to the store for those pints of ice cream and a nice talk, you can set that right tonight if you feel bad about it.
Point is: You are miles away from the depths you were in just a couple of months ago. And we got your back. Always.
Oh BTW, Jstar: unbelievably, I have some experience with the breast feeding issue. can you get a breast pump and save the milk for when you aren't around? Both my kids were breast fed and W worked. So she just pumped and stored. When the babies were in daycare, they still had breast milk.
Cheers.
No problem AG, context doesn't stop with pages on this site. I understood where you were coming from and always appreciate the posts. They give me something to look forward to.
Thanks for the pick-me-up. You are right, I am MUCH better now than I was in early June and I do believe that things will be ok, but it is just sometimes hard to see from here. Sometimes I still feel like I want to blubber a bit myself. Getting over that slowly but surely though.
I think I will revisit the issue with my D as you and Steve suggested. I have to do better and be more positive with the kids. They don't deserve this either. They are both very smart and seem older than they really are. This will make them grow-up even faster and it makes me very sad that they even have to deal with this. Things haven't really changed for them too much yet since we are all still living together. The hard part will come when we actually separate and they start to get shuffled around a lot. I suppose they will get used to it in time.
I think Jstar's baby has an issue with not feeding out of a bottle or something. It does help me to try to help others, even if I don't always know what I am talking about. Many of the people on here seem so much more insightful than I do.
Things haven't really changed for them too much yet since we are all still living together. The hard part will come when we actually separate and they start to get shuffled around a lot. I suppose they will get used to it in time. 
