Sure you can always read the bible at a bar, bring the small ones to pass around and collect them back on the way out.
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We've got little red or black bibles at work (I prefer red, it goes better with my socks) that I could pass out but would that be like stealing? Is that worse than swearing? Apparently nothing is worse than swearing so I'm in the clear! Maybe I'll head down to Hooters tonight after work and get started on my missions trip.
[quote= Wii, do you ever stop? Can I just secretly tape your typical day like a fly on the wall? I bet it'll be instant comedy.
[/quote]
Well Romeo, for my first act today I declared "Coasterless Coffee Cup Day" at our staff meeting. The boss is on vacation so I implored my co-workers to "throw away your coasters, liberate yourselves. Coffee cups without coasters...be free!" The boss is always monitoring like a hawk the use of coasters on the boardroom furniture. I struck a first blow for liberty, who knows where it will end. So my day continues...need to hear any more? Probably not.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
OK, in the hopes of settling this issue regarding Christians and swearing I decided to research the biblical evidence on the subject and have uncovered some startling new developments. I went directly to the good book for guidance in this matter and lo and behold, this is what I discovered:
The Lord himself swears: "I swear by myself, declares the Lord" Genesis 22:16 He encourages swearing "I want you to swear" Genesis 24:3 In fact, He makes us swear: "By me every tongue will swear" Genesis 21:23 And finally the Lord himself even flips the bird (He must drive)!: "I swear with uplifted hand" Ezekiel 36:7
This is amazing stuff, I think I need to get it to my Pastor immediately. This issue is now friggin' closed.
Wii you just solved the puzzle that's been a mystery to the church since it's inception. I nominate you for a world peace award.
Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
For an encore, I will use the same due diligence to uncover the biblical truth about sex before marriage. I could get royally screwed for this one!...OK, maybe I'll just roll over and have a smoke instead, digging for the truth is exhausting work. Btw, does Hell have a beach?
Well, for all those loyal followers of the Whatis Bible Chronicles, I have a new series to announce. For a limited time only you can subscribe to this series and receive a spanking new biblical CD every month. Think of what a great Christmas gift this would make for that someone special. Act now and you will get honest answers to these timeless biblical questions:
Hell: Is it Buffalo, New York? Is Lucifer really Satan in drag? Joseph's Coat of Many Colours: A cheap Chinese Import? Does God have a Sister...and is she still single? The Garden of Eden: Was It A Top Secret Grow Op? Peters Denial: Was it fear or dementia? The Ten Commandments: Is there a comic book version? Who really knocked up Sarah? Was Jesus collecting welfare under 12 different names? Adam and Eve: Were they actually expelled Russian spies? Abraham’s sacrifice: Was it really God speaking or too much violence on TV?
...and as an added bonus I'll get back to posting about my incredibly exciting life as a single man...after the football game which starts shortly!