PEI I do get once you are GALing you aren't paying attention so much to texts and phone calls. But when you have an ounce of hope...those texts and phone calls do have an impact...whether we want to admit it or not....no matter how much fun we are having.
GALing is a great thing...but time and space are even better.
lola ... even when you don't have an ounce of hope those texts and phone calls can have an impact ... if you haven't DETACHED. That should be your focus right now.
And from where I sit, time and space are necessary, but also a bit overwhelming if you're not GALing.
I used the insight from some of those books to improve my R with S5 and D6. Certainly has had an impact for me. But I agree, I had to stop at a point too ... it got to be too much and I had to turn my focus back around to me.
Peace PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
But when you have an ounce of hope...those texts and phone calls do have an impact
Recomendation: keep a journal with all the little stuff in it, he texted me at this time. he emailed me he smiled at me he asked me to coffee etc.
It is funny how it takes many of these small things to give you hope or build up your hope and it only takes one small negative to tear it all down.
Hey I am Mr. Positive Mental Attitude, but the only way I keep that up is that I nuture my HOPE daily. Where is the positive in the day, if I don't have one then I look back and see how far I have come in a month, 2 months, 6 months and it gives me hope.
Just last week, my W sent me an email that took me right out of that HOPE HIGH I was on. I broke out my journal and started working backwards in time writing down all the little insignificant positive things that have happened. I only got to go back about 2 or 3 weeks and I had filled the page.
Point is HOPE is what keeps me going so I have to feed my HOPE.
1 Corinthians 13:1-13 ....Love always Hopes.....
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
thanks MHL I think it is great that you keep a journal. It really does keep things in check. We tend to be stuck in the moment and forget what we have been thru....we cling on to the very last thing that we hear or see.
As for me...I don't think I want my M...but I still cannot seem to completely let go. I think I am definitely more detached than I have been....but I am still not at that point to say to myself 'oh it's you...oh ok..yeah..I'm busy- I'll get back to you later' or 'oh it's you..how are things going?'. I am kind of in a no mans land. I am embarressed to admit...I think I am looking for him to want me back more than I want to be back with him. I know this is wrong..but I am just being honest. It isn't to reject him like he rejected me...I think it is just that feeling that most of us have (even if we don't want to admit to it)...what is it called?
Grit- Kudos for trying. Kudos to everyone that even attempts to be a better person. Some people don't even attempt it. It says alot about you as a person...even if you aren't always successful. At least you tried..right?
Uck..It is external validation...and I have heard it over and over again...and I have to agree. I am just not sure why. Do people really live without external validation? Is external validation not important at all? Isn't it kind of a process of checks and balances? I know I am setting myself up here...but who doesn't look for external validation? Could I really live my life without it?