Quote: LL, There must have been a reason you wanted him back. Can you think of what it was? How long was he gone? Rachael
he was gone over six months...honestly..I think the reason I wanted him back was so that I didn't have to face being a divorce mother of two at 30.
Finding out about ow was just about the end to me anyway...I recall saying to one of my friends (the brother or the woman who saw h with ow) I can't put up with this, I wasn't happy to begin with...I can't stay with him...help me do this.
that week h and I talked alot about m and our r...the only time he seemed at ease was when I talked of just ending our m...he talked and talked and despite the fact that he had voluntarily stayed at his parents for a week or so after he was here awake til 1am talking to me etc.
the reason I wanted him back and part of the reason I don't just give up? because in there somewhere is the guy I fell in love with long ago..every once in a while he comes back to the surface...I've stayed around waiting and waiting for life to not continue to drown him out..he himself kept promising me that man would come back with time..just that work and other things needed to happen first...well the clincher was that man did come to the surface..but it was not for me..that man came to the surface for another.
I don't forgive him and I probably never will and don't feel that I should have to, he obviously isn't showing me that I should forgive him. Maybe I would forgive him if it did him some good..after all he's gotta realize that if she could cheat on her h so could I right?
h used me to get back into his home and to the kids so that he didn't have to be the bad guy anymore...now I'm stuck with the crippled dog I let in.
never feed stray animals! they become your responsibility.
