A new beginning to an end

[soleil]

It seemed to me he was very interested in getting his house free and clear while you were stuck with the used furniture?

Yes, that is correct. He filed for a legal separation through his attorney about 12 days after I moved out. He was adamant about us "not working" and did NOT want me to sign his green card for him. Then all of a sudden in January, something changed. He starts saying he wants to go to MC, he needs his GC signed and if I won't do it, he will have to file for D so he can get it on his own. I told him let's wait and do MC, but that I would sign it for him no matter what and he went and filed for D. Fast forward a few months of MC and he tells me The Big Story: that he wants to talk, that he f-cked the random club girl (same age I was when I met him - 23), and oh, by the way, he got his GC 2-ish months back. What? Re:the club girl, in January, H took me to this gorgeous nightclub downtown. I spent all day picking out a new outfit, got my hair done, etc. Come to find out, this was the same place he met said girl just a few weeks before and took her back to his friend's house (with her sister) and they each f-cked one of the girls. Classy, yes?
Then he says he wants to try to make us work, try everything, etc. And he cancels MC two days later without even telling/asking me.

But I digress. Maybe you are right. Maybe I have blinders on. (or did). He did file to dismiss the D a month after he petitioned it but I never signed it. I went one day to put in the mail box but I just ... didn't. Now to add to this, between all the lines in this mess, H and I have hung out almost every week since Dec/Jan up until recently and he's always saying how he loves me/misses me, etc. It's like a double entendre.

Changing gears again...you should think about the future though like if you plan to have kids, family etc do you see him as that person you can rely on and grow old with? If not, this is the time to end this. As harsh as it may sound I see so much positive in your and Brena's situation because you are both young and no kids yet!

When I was still living with H I would say there was no way in hell I'd have a baby with him (at the mo') since he would blank me for daaays on end/weeks. I couldn't imagine raising a child w/ that. Now that we're going through this I find myself thinking about how I'm 29 and have no kids, husband, or house. Funny how that happens. I don't feel "old" really but every day it seems a girlfriend of mine is getting pregnant and/or married. It just makes me think. And yes, I should totally take my own advice.

The house is mostly mine and I did f@#% up our life.

Why do you feel that YOU f-cked up your lives? He is the one carrying on with some other broad. As for him denying it, that's just lame at this point. But like someone in their other thread said--liars lie. And I agree with you -- he should be the one to move out. Did you tell anyone he was having an A? I know a lot of people say to "bust the affair." Do you still sleep in the same bed as him? Any movement on your house selling?