Thanks for the replies R2C and NB. It feels good to have the support and some positive feedback on my efforts.
NB, I do check on her too sometimes, but not nearly as much as I used to and I am trying to quit.
My W works part-time right now and is refusing to go back full-time until "later", but I don't know when that will be. She has a job with the state of WI and wants to remain in her position, only in a full-time role. She is anticipating some retirements will happen soon in our area and that she will be able to get one of those jobs. There might also be the possibility that she can take her part-time position to a full-time position. I have talked to her repeatedly about paying her way and going back full-time, but to no avail. She seems content to live off of me.
I can't legally kick her out of the house, since we own it jointly and my atty said the court isn't likely to require her to move out. She also said that the court will likely base Child Support and Maintenance/Alimony payments based on her working full-time, but since she has been part-time for 11 years, they will likely give her some time and phase the payments down.
W likes to tell me that "it is not your money, it is our money and you are discounting everything I have done in the last 20 years." I should have told her that she is discounting everything that I have done in the last 20 years and Ding me!! As far as I am concerned, when she stopped showing me any affection, had an affair, filed for D and stopped sharing a bed, I stopped sharing my bank account.
She is on her own now, except that certain bills still have to be paid, like the mortgage and utilities, but at least I am getting some $ from her. She offerred to write me a check for $15 towards the water bill yesterday, but I turned it down and will work for a larger combined number when she gets paid on Thursday. We'll see what the court has to say on Monday in our hearing for a Temporary Order. I'm hoping they require her to go back to work sooner rather than later.
What a bunch of sh!t. She wants a divorce, she just doesn't want it RIGHT NOW! She wants it on her timetable and according to her plans. I'm doing my best not to let that happen and it does seem that a lot of her grand plans are imploding in on her!
1) Her OM won't D his wife. 2) Her OM had an affair with OW2 and she knows it. 3) I am likely to get 50% placement/custody. (Thought se would get primary and I would be a week-end dad. 4) #3 means reduced child support. 5) I'm working on beating down the alimony payment. 6) No equity left in the house. 7) Her brother won't let his kids go on vacation with us and 7) She isn't going on the "family" vacation she demanded that we keep.
She is all stressed-out, but still stone-cold poker faced. I almost feel sorry for her sometimes. I think she is pathetic.
