How To Tell The Kids

[Ready2Change]

....I did break down a bit on the ride home....

At one point I decided to allow myself to cry in front of my kids. I chose to do this based off of all the reading I have done. S9 said, "I didn't think adults cried"...Stuffed emotions need to come out....Do we want our kids to stuff all their emotions until they are 40?

It's funny too, because I actually believe that I could probably find someone else who is more compatible for me than W. I guess the problem is the "probably" part.

Right now, working on YOU and your interactions with your W (as well as other women) is important. You will carry all your new learned skills with you. There are lots of single women out there

Fear of the unknown. My history is to get comfortable and stick with it.

180's I did : Let go of the fear. Be in the moment. Let go of the control. If someone wants to leave, IT IS OK.....

All the lies she has told me, the A with the OM, her delusional fantasy life, the shitty way she treated me when I was trying so hard to change to do the things she wanted and make a deeper emotional connection are all combining to make me wonder if I should even keep trying or just move on. I really think that I could do better.

The changes you make are for YOU. How you will treat others, how you will let others treat you. The "You know what, you are right, this is not working for me either..." state of mind and speech are key. You can do better.....

But then there are still these deep feelings that I have for her. And the kids.

She is making irresponsible decisions....the kids suffer. Be empathetic, strong and compassionate to your kids.

I really do think that W is going to be shocked when she finds out what her financial position is going to be at the end of this. But I don't want her back just because of the money either.

The sooner reality hits the better. She needs to feel all the shock at once.

I just don't know anymore........

All the mixed feelings and thoughts are normal. Setting her free, standing up to her, listening to her, walking away from lies, being there for your kids, finding happiness ALONE, having fun flirting with other women, making new relationships, setting and holding boundaries, crying, screaming and singing in the car....Let go of the outcome.

I wish you well.