I gave up...filed for D

[luvless]

Hey...I'm just gonna journal

I had a rough day. I have to say I'm over this sh*t...really. I think I'm doing fine and then bam - like getting punched in the stomach.

My S15 tells me - hey mom do you know dad said, "you know his friend" (gf) helped him pick out my cell phone?...in front of those people he lives with and it was so awkward!" I was livid...thinking what is wrong with this man does he have any sense? My older son says, "dad's a fag!" what are we supposed to do?

I see their frustration as he makes passive aggressive remarks to them and I know it hurts them dearly. They don't want to see him and I forced them to go see him this last time. Maybe I won't be forcing them again.

I feel bad enough knowing my former husband betrayed me...but the kids? I can't handle that part. There is no reason on earth he should be telling them about his whorefriend. They are not ready for that.

I don't wish this crap on my worst enemy.

Luv