Well, you know X lied and told the Dr. that we both wanted her off the meds. And they don't want to get involved in any legal disputes, I was told, or we will have to look for a new doctor, and there are only 2 or 3 child psychs in our area. She generally has been good, and had D10 on a low dosage which I appreciated. I would hope something could be done; we'll see I guess. I do think X is still in denial to some extent and I know he did mention saving the $60 each month--that's almost his iphone payment you know. He's signed her up for theatre camp next week, and school starts soon. The sad thing to me is that these people, at the camp she's going to next week, and her teachers next year, don't know her, so don't know what a sweetie she normally is when she's on the meds. It's very frustrating not being able to do something!!!
There is...get her back on her meds if she does better with them. Mike is such a manipulator, he doesn't care if it hurts his own kids. You need to stand up for her on this issue.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Yep. I'm at least going to try. I called & we have the earliest appt. available-Aug. 13th. D10 was upset last weekend, and told me I wasn't her parent, that X was, b/c he is the decisionmaker, and decides everything. If nothing else, she's going to see that I am speaking up for her and she needs to speak up for herself also. I emailed D10's troubling comments to him and he emailed back he's never had a problem; when she tantrums he has her go in her room until she calms down. I think my point is if she's doing great on her meds with no side effects, which is what he previously told the Dr., then why have her go through the tantrums and weird behavior...
I have been where you have been but I was fighting the Doctor. If I knew that S14 had been sick I wasn't going to rush and make him have a transfusion. But on top of that, I had to fight to get the results all the time. They used to say what S14 had wasn't life threatening but whenever I stood up for him, they would threaten that he could die.
Right after I had D11, I changed doctors because I wasn't in the game playing business. He had his spleen taken out in February and we had changed him to the new doctor in January. You know your child and their issues better than anybody, don't let anyone bully you around on that.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
So X emailed me back that when D10 acts like that, when she was talking about hurting the cat or starving herself b/c she doesn't want to live, he has her go in her room until she calms down. Um, that doesn't really help the problem; doesn't that just make it easier for him? I think he missed my point.
I emailed X today re: the dr. appt. Turns out he scheduled an ot appt for D10 that day, Friday, which is one of my days to have her for custody. I told him he can schedule her appts. for Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday. He emailed back that day was the only day they would schedule her (huh?) and am I refusing to let him take her to OT? I emailed back I am taking her to her Dr.'s appt. that day, and he can reschedule her OT or not. I've realized lately he's not the boss of me, although he wants to be. Have you heard that song by Sara Bareilles something like who made you king of everything? Who cares if you disagree; you're not me. I could really relate to that song!!!
I love Sara Bareilles. Absolutely relate. I'm not sure that sending a 10 yr old to her room b/c of behavior problems is the best course of action. She's talking about hurting herself or others and he's not taking that seriously? I understand the need to see your child in a certain way and deny problems but you can't bury your head in the sand with certain issues.
The school should be a big ally for you. Talk to her teachers and the counselor. Let them know that X took her off her meds this summer and they should record behavior patterns for awhile to assess whether or not she's doing as well as she did last year. School's prefer meds in general so they should be willing to watch her.
Maybe it's something you should address with her C as well. Let her know what she's saying and how X it handling it. Not that you're tattling, just concerned that you both have a uniform approach to it. She can talk to your D and let you know how serious she is.
BTW- good to hear from you. Sorry your X is still such an a$$. You'd think with the D final he'd back off a bit. Hopefully, in time, he will.
Good for you in realizing that you owe your ex nothing and that he has voluntarily abdicated all privileges he might once have held to offer any input in how you live your life or how you parent your children. Let him suffer the consequences of his own foolish choices and do not let his frustrations concern you.
I've already gotten in 2012 (John Cusack!) and Yes Man. They were at the top of my queue. But we can get something else if you want. I'm just happy to watch anything at this point!
Sorry to hear about your birthday.
Tomorrow D10 is going to be in a play in the theater camp X enrolled her in for the week while S16 is on his church trip. I'm guessing he was feeling guilty b/c he missed D10's play last month while he was vacationing with OW. So now he'll get to see her in a play. I'm going tomorrow, and I'm guess OW will be with X; the first time I've had to see them together other than for a minute picking up or dropping off the kids. I'm stressed over it. I asked a friend from work to come with me that's been through this a couple years ago, for moral support. I plan to look good too! I'm just going to focus on D10 and I"m sure she's going to be wonderful.
Of course she will do well. I haven't had to deal with ex's GF/fiance yet. I hope to not have to see her for a very long time!
I haven't seen 2012 so I am up for that if you haven't watched it. Let me know. I am open Saturday afternoon and early evening but hoping to see Knight and Day Saturday night with the boys.
You are going to be fine. Hugs, kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I'm just going to focus on D10 and I"m sure she's going to be wonderful.