I've worried the same about pushing my W to D. I'm far more detached than I was the first two weeks, and my W is reacting to it (instead of me reacting to her). It's hard to trust the DB strategy, but think of the alternative; begging, pleading, and pursuing is never going to work. Ever. All it does is make you feel worse, and push your WAS away.
Cake eating is a big problem in limboland. Though I wouldn't mind ML with my wife, it's not going to happen. Instead she's taking baby steps to separate, since she's so scared of the unknown. Part of me thinks that a good dunking in reality will make her regret leaving, but that's just my usual optimism.
If you can stand the heat, stall or halt any actions you take towards the D. Make him do it. It'll be hard, but if you're doing your 180s, GAL, and being happier and nice in general, it's easier for him to see than if he moves out and your contact is limited.
The hard part is that most WAS aren't thinking, they're feeling. And depending on if there's an OP in the picture, there feelings are apesh#t crazy. Guilt, fear, anger, love, all mashed into one skull.
