Quote: how will I explain to dd why her baby book isn't as filled in as son's? myself being the last of three children..I didn't even have a baby book..so I swore that all my children would..with son I was dedicated and wrote in it each month his little milestones or just some motherly banter...with dd I started to do the same despite the fact that I was tired and strained and depressed and knew something just wasn't right...her baby book stopped being filled in about the time I discovered ow...she was just three months old...her first year of life was a blur to me...though I was determined to take lots and lots of pics..I am saddened to look at them now for I am reminded of how daddy wasn't even living here for her first birthday.
Don't explain, just fill it in anyway. Make something up, she will never know. There are gaps in my DD's baby book too and that is what I plan to do. Far better that than have her think you didn't care.
Remember you are doing it for her, not for you. The pics make you sad but she won't know. I had a pic I treasured for ages of my mum and I nose to nose and smiling when I was about 2 years old. It wasn't until much later that I found out it wasn't me but my cousin. The point is I got a lot of pleasure from that picture even though it wasn't real so your DD can get a lot of pleasure from the baby book even if you make stuff up. Most of it will be pretty accurate anyway. You know the milestones roughly and you know how you felt/feel about her.
Like you say she was your strength and joy - you can put that bit in for starters!
take care
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
