2nd M 2nd separation just starting

[TimeHeals]

I did tell her she dwells too much on the past, holds a grudge all the time and can't just let go(said this last night)

Lecturing people on how to feel when they are in a negative cycle doesn't usually work. "I'm sorry you feel that way" gets you a lot further.

I did forget to mention when I did hold her and kiss her forhead she didn't pull away, rob but she did just start balling like a baby.

Ummm... don't pursue anymore right now.

Detaching is to give you the emotional space you need to heal and GAL and to make healthy changes. It's a bonus that she might do the same if that happens.

Pursuing somebody isn't the best way--sometimes--to fight for your M (especially when doing so brings them to tears or opens up hot cans of resentment).