Well, I realized when he started paying closer attention to his appearance that it was a HUGE red flag. Not that people can't care about their looks (and should) but the drastic change is a definite tipoff. All my efforts to find any kind of proof of such have been to no avail. Quite frankly, right now I don't see when anything would be happening. It would have to be during work hours - not that it is impossible for that to happen, of course. H doesn't even have a car at work - takes the bus into the city. Of course, doesn't mean OW couldn't have a car. I realize it's a distinct possibility with all the signs. That's why I had decided, before he agreed to go on this weekend, that I was going to confront him - proof or no proof - about his behavior (secret keeping, talking to other people, both men and women about our issues, and his unwillingness to work on M). Either all this stops or he leaves, simple as that. This weekend thing we're going on will probably bring it all to a head anyway. I'm betting it will be make it or break it.
