Quote: Interesting Deb, as I used to think my H wanted me to react to his mood or maybe I did react to his mood, it became my mood. Now I'm noticing that when his mood is distant and I act detached and upbeat, he'll come closer.
This is an EXCELLENT place to start your detaching!
Stop the "mood-monitoring"!
Moods are just moods. They come and they go. We all have them, even me!
When I get in a "bad mood", I really don't need for my wife to "mirror" it. When she does, it will usually last longer, and tends to turn into a "bad attitude". That's when things start to turn bad for us.
When she "detaches" from my mood just a bit, gives me some space, stays more upbeat and empathetic, and not make ME responsible for HER bad mood, I tend to do like Cathy's H, and draw just a bit closer soon.
This also seems to work both ways for us!
JJ
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