I dont know what to tell myself. Great out of this mess that you are creating for yourself. Be happy, work, go to school, play golf-that is the three things you like to do. I want to do those things. I really do. I want be happy. I want to live a fulfilled life. I have a friend that is a girl but I just don't want to drag her into this anymore than I have. I don't tell her these things. If she was smart she would run from me if I did. I really don't find her attractive but I like talking with her. I just can not believe what has happened. Stills seems like a nightmare. And then calling me and begging to come back. She did this last week and I said ok. And then she didn't show. Why, why do people play with others like this?
