I guess I see this situation of living together once again as first and foremost a final chance to save the M and secondly (if reconcilliation does not occur) an opportunity to get a little bit stronger financially before we permanently dissolve the marriage.
BA
I didn't use this 'direct' approach I posted above through my sitch. I was way too worried about 'rocking the boat', but I won't make that mistake again in any future R's. I'm actually doing it right now with my STBXW - although she doesn't care for it much (because it's mostly calling her on her crap) it's unbelievably liberating and freeing for me - I'm not going to hide myself anymore. From anyone.
When you look at it, being totally straight up and speaking your mind shows the person exactly who you are and where you're at in that moment. If someone doesn't like it, then they're not for me.
So the quote above shows your position. I would want this clarified before she moved in. I'd want to know what her expectations are and I would want to be very clear about telling her what my expectations are. It's the unspoken expectations which lead to a great deal of confusion, hurt feelings, etc...
I'd want it ALL laid right out on the table. Then look at it and see if it's acceptable. If not, take a pass.
MySitch Me-47 STBXW-41 D-5 S-8 ILYBNILWY-01/08 Want a D- 01/09 Physical Sep-01/10 D filed-06/10 Got 50% custody=09/11 Ride that wave!
