Why not, "W, I know we've been more affectionate these past few weeks than we have been in a long time. We ML for the first time in two years. We are talking about you moving back in the house. My mind is starting to move in a direction of possible reconciliation but I don't want to walk on eggshells, or even worse, get into trying to 'mind read' your intentions. I have learned being straight up and talking about it is the healthiest way for me to be so I want to ask you what your intentions are. Are you thinking about reconciliation or are you just moving back into the house with no desire to reconcile?"
Thanks Steady! I do like the above alot and I can see this working in a very non-threatening way to her.
I am apprehensive about living in the same house again, especially if it brings back the tension that we once had. However, I also see it as an opportunity to further the progress down the road to reconcilliation. I am in a different place than I was 2 years ago (or even 1 year ago for that matter.) If the tension starts to rise again to where it was before once she moves back in, then I am prepared to tell her that this is not working and just making things worse and that she needs to start looking for her own place to live. Before I had the mentality of just staying the course and dealing with the unpleasantness. I'm not there anymore.
Our girls are 13 and 12. They have really adjusted well to everything and I think they see their Mom and I as a team still in raising them. We have been very successful in co-parenting and there has not been one instance in the past 2 years where either one of us "used" the girls against each other, or kept them from seeing either of us. We have encouraged them to ask questions along the way about anything regarding our situation and to let us know if they concerns.
I guess I see this situation of living together once again as first and foremost a final chance to save the M and secondly (if reconcilliation does not occur) an opportunity to get a little bit stronger financially before we permanently dissolve the marriage.
