New here, not sure where to start

[ericmsant2]

ITay
First I want to apologize if I have offended you in any way. That was and is never my intent.

My H pretends like he's trying

To feel better, to love me again, to wait until I've had enough, til he finds someone else

he should feel guilty

ITay – these quotes say to me that you are still trying to “be” in your H’s head. You act like you really know what he is thinking. I have done this in the past and sometimes still do. What I want to tell you is that YOU do NOT know what is in HIS head. You really don’t. Stop thinking about what he is doing or thinking and start thinking and focusing on YOU. Right now, you need to move forward and “act as if” he may not be coming back. Okay…Okay…your probably going to say that you will not love him. You will dear. If everything that you have written about the old H is true, well then this love will survive. Loving him soooooo much….is IMO….giving him the time HE needs to figure his own sh*t out.

I had such big plans for the rest of our lives together

So take the “our” out of the above quote and tell me what “such big plans” are for YOU. What really do you want to do in your life. What is YOUR “Bucket List”.

And he blew it..he threw it all away.

Has he blown it all away or are YOU in your anger taking it away? Seriously, imagine if…just if….he woke up in a year…said sorry…realized what he had in you. How might you feel if you did not go that extra mile…if you did not have just a litttttllllllleee more patience. Think about it.

if you're reading this my dearest H, just know that you'll NEVER find anyone like me again..ever.

Don’t tell him SHOW him. SHOW him what a compassionate, loving, understanding and FUN person YOU ARE. Words my friend will not help in MLC – ONLY ACTIONS. Just remember….and please keep thinking about this….YOUR ACTIONS ARE WHAT YOU WANT TO DO. They are not for YOUR H. Why? Because if you do things, make changes, whatever for someone else…well that may not be WHO YOU REALLY ARE.
You sound better – you do.
If you are in MN, let me know on the alt. I used to have to go to Minneapolis for business and have a few friends that I may be able to reach out to.

God Bless,
Eric