Well it sounds like he thinks he's all that and a bag of chips and is going to control your actions by restricting your access to the finances. Don't let him get away with this crap anymore.

Open up a separate checking account and have your salary start going to it - he should not be dominating the financial picture when you both work.

In the visit you have set up with the L ask for a temporary child support order which will require him to start providing you with money for your kids - if your state allows this.

Your H is being completely unreasonable and an a$$hole if you ask me.

BA